It’s been more than two decades, yet you still can’t get over the loss of a loved one.
It could be a parent, a spouse, a close friend, a child, or even a pet. Although there is no proven prescription for easing grief, there are techniques to help you transform your loss into a loving, healing experience by forming a spiritual relationship with a deceased loved one.
Many people have reported seeing their departed loved ones in their dreams or in disembodied form. Some people have waited for such visits, but they never came. Others would then go to spirit mediums to establish contact with their loved ones in the spirit world.
I sense the presence of spirits through my inner knowing (clairsentience) or through fleeting glimpses of their “physical” appearances. However, I have not initiated a direct interaction with them. The majority of these “presences” are unknown to me. Loved ones who would “visit” me in my dreams do so. They normally communicate their messages through dreams, or simply telepathically, without “appearing” in front of me. It’s probably because they knew I’d be afraid! However, I would rather not entertain the presence of other identities by not establishing dialogues with them.
So, having said that, if you feel the need to reconnect with a departed loved one in order to recover from your grief, recognise that they are definitely present, even if you cannot see or hear them.
Caution: Do not “call” on your loved one to speak with you because this may attract unfamiliar spirits. Every time you want to initiate this connection, pray to the angels, God, Mother Mary, the Saints, or whatever your faith or religion is. Always ask for Divine intervention and protection.
- Maintain your contact with them, but acknowledge that they are already in spirit and that their soul must evolve
You may be tempted to talk to them as if they are still alive and in a capacity that they had while still alive – as a husband, your partner, your mother, etc… Recognise that that role is part of your memory with them and no longer is. They can guide you to solving difficulties, but they cannot solve them for you. Help them spiritually by wishing them peace, love, and comfort as a spirit.
2. Talk to them as if they are in the “next” room
Although we are not in the same plane as our spirit loved ones, they are everywhere around us. They are merely in the “next room” to ours, so you may talk to them as if they were in the next room – not too close, but close enough. The awareness that there is a separation between you and their spirit is for your protection as you draw (and respect) boundaries between both planes.
3. Write them letters
You can start a journal or write them letters – whatever type of letter you wish to give them. However, make your letters more “spiritual.” It’s because the new “connection” you’re cultivating with them is no longer an “earthly” one. It is also intended to aid in your spiritual development. The letters you write will also serve as an outlet for experiencing your relationship in a new and profound way.
You can also continue to SMS them, email or send them direct messages on social media. This is what I do when I wish to contact my mother, eldest sister, or any close friends who have died. Facebook has finally found a noble purpose.
4. Plant a tree or a flower in their honour
You can keep their memories alive by caring for a live plant. I’m not a fan of naming pets after lost loved ones, but if it helps, then, by all means. You might also organise a charity drive, projects, or other events that will help you and others remember your loved one in a loving and kind manner.
5. Start an occasional prayer chain
Why not start a chain prayer among friends and relatives on their death and birth anniversaries? While chain letters are frowned upon, folks who know you personally will appreciate a chain prayer for a specific purpose. Each receiver may add their own line of prayer for your loved one.
6. Think of creative ways to connect and remember
Prayers/novena, songs, art, food, or travel to places where you shared happy experiences with your departed loved ones when they were still living can all be adopted. Make them aware that they will not be forgotten.
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