These past few days, I have been fighting off the “demons” inside me by pushing aside these dark thoughts that seem to gnaw at my spirit. I look at it in an optimistic perspective, in that, being aware of that darkness within me, gives me the chance to disperse it and shine light on it. It is tempting to just give in to these shadow thoughts because it is more convenient, I guess, and requires less accountability. If one is not careful and becomes accustomed to having those negative thoughts, it will become one’s default operational personality.
I am sharing here this prayer that I wrote impromptu today. I hope this helps those seeking light from those murky thoughts.
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Dear God, purify my mind from thoughts
of getting even with people who have hurt me,
of going back to the past to serve my ego and not my highest good,
of seeking pleasure out of someone else’s pain,
of envy and pride because they can give a false sense of gratitude,
of insisting to be right all the time,
of using other people’s strengths for my selfish gain,
of taking something or someone that belongs to someone else,
of hurting myself and disregarding its consequences,
of not making choices because of irresponsibility,
of lying to gain someone’s trust,
of cheating to avoid accountability,
of betraying to hide my true intention,
of withholding affection to make someone guilty,
of not loving because of fear,
of not opening up because of mistrust.
Make me a better person each and every moment that I breathe. Make me worthy of my life and Your love and confidence.
Amen.