How to Talk with Your Loved Ones Across the Veil

Talk with them as if they are just in the next room….

For people in need of consolation amid their grief and loss of a loved one, there are various ways you can continue your relationship and communication with them. Some employ tools such as divination tools like tarot, crystal balls, scrying instruments, or Ouija boards. Others use rituals, while some seek the services of a medium. In my experience, I have established communication with my loved ones in the Spirit World through persistence and faith in my ability to communicate through the heart.

First and foremost, one needs to be patient because reestablishing this communication, while easy, has to be done within a process. There must be both internal and external preparedness. It’s easy to say that we are willing to communicate with them anytime, but the question is, are we emotionally, morally, and spiritually prepared?

Related: Apologies from the Grave

There are also things that we, as initiators of the communication, need to understand: the relationship we had with a loved one shifts once they depart from this world. In my belief, this relationship evolves into something less selfish.

What I mean is that if the departed loved one used to be our mother, in the spirit world, the assignment of being a “mother” has ceased. This assignment is earthly in nature. In the spirit world, they have transitioned into a spirit with a more universal identity and role. We may still refer to them as our mother here on earth, but emotionally, we must accept that the mother they were no longer exists in the spirit world.

For me, it is important because accepting this change in their status can help liberate them from the circumstances, emotions, attachments, etc., that are associated with their earthly status or assignment.

Steps to start communicating (based on my experience)

1. Prepare yourself. You may meditate or pray. The goal is to come from a place of peace, calm, composure, and joy. In other words, be in an optimistic mood. When you start communicating while grieving heavily, crying, in denial, or in anger, you will not be quite receptive to the subtle messages from the spirit world. You will have become prone to second guesses or biases.

2. If you are just starting with communicating, pray to God, the Blessed Mother, the Holy Spirit, Jesus, your guardian angels, or your patron saint of choice for intercession. They will serve as your conduit to the spirit world. Besides, they will protect you and filter your intentions by purifying them and help raise your vibrations. When you become accustomed to communicating, you still must pray, but you are more free to communicate directly with your loved ones.

3. Ask permission to start your conversation: “May we have a conversation?” or “Let’s talk.” This way, you are establishing the connection with control. This signals that you are open to conversation. It can prevent unwanted communications from other spirits or unwanted messages from coming through when you are least aware.

4. When communicating with loved ones, while it is okay to call them “mom” or “dad”, it is more direct if you state their full name. For example: “May we have a talk, Mom, Maria Ana Santos dela Cruz?” This can establish a more direct link to the spirit you wish to talk to.

5. When you start your conversation, remember these three things: Trust yourself and the messages you receive, do not overthink the messages even if the sentences, visuals, or symbols shown to you do not make sense at first, and stick to the first impression. The reason being is that the first impression involves intuition. Decipher the meanings later after the conversation or ask for clarity. It is also important to have a pen and paper with you where you can scribble down the words or symbols that you receive. If you are communicating with your eyes closed, make the paper sheet big enough so you do not need to worry about writing neatly, just scribble on it even without looking at the paper.

6. Express your gratitude to your intercessor (Guardian Angels, Etc.) and your loved ones upon ending your conversation. Saying “Thank you,” for example, signals to both of you that your conversation has ended, your connection has been cut, and that you are not accepting unwanted messages from random spirits.

Simply put..
Ask your question. You may ask loudly or silently.
Quiet your mind to listen for the answer.
Trust your first impression. The first feeling or thought that pops into your mind is the answer

If after the communication, you feel exhausted or suddenly in grief or heavy hearted, do grounding exercises or simply go out and immersed with nature – walk barefoot on the grass or sand; touch or hug a tree, wash your hands in water and use the water for the plants. In my experience when I started getting depressed in my first attempt at communication, I stopped communicating until I feel that I am healed emotionally and psychologically from the loss.

Building a special space for communication


I read in this book, “How to Talk to the Other Side by Dr. Gary Fearn D.D, ” about creating what the author calls a “mental psychic room.” This is a special space you form in your mind where you will conduct your psychic events and find answers. According to the author, you may also use this mental space as a rejuvenating room to regain energy after a busy or bad day. To build the s aid room, the author suggested meditation. You may find the link below to the short video on meditation to create a psychic room mentally.

Related: Build Spiritual Relationship with a Departed Loved One


While in this meditative state, envision a glass elevator in your mind and step inside. Instruct the elevator to take you to the top floor. Feel the slow, steady speed of the elevator as it ascends towards the top, making brief stops on every floor, each represented by the colors of the Chakras – Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue (light blue), Indigo (dark blue), Purple, and White for the Top Floor.

The first floor is colored red, like ruby red. When the elevator door opens on this floor, allow the red color to float and circle around you. Inhale deeply and exhale, releasing negative thoughts and feelings.
As the door closes and the elevator ascends to the next floor, colored orange, repeat the same procedure. Let the orange color envelop you, removing worries and stress.
The next floor is colored yellow, vibrant like the sun, filling you with happiness and peace.
Moving up, you reach the green floor, shaded like emerald. Again, follow the same process as before.
FIFTH FLOOR: Blue (light blue) / Indigo (dark blue)
The following floor is light blue, transitioning into darker and brighter hues, making you feel light, free, and safe.

The next floor is purple, growing more vibrant, fostering a sense of connection with every living creature. You and the color purple become one. Take three deep breaths as the door closes. Finally, you reach the topmost floor, which is pure white, glowing and sparkling. This fills you with warmth and happiness.

As the door opens, white light floats above, below, and around you, enveloping you. Step out of the elevator and you’ll find a door a few steps in front of you.

As you walk towards the door, notice how it gradually widens with each step until you reach its threshold. Step inside and feel yourself entering your mental psychic room. Initially bare, this space awaits your command for customization. Personalize it as you would your own reading or meditation room. You can add a couch, being specific with the color and the shape that you prefer and this will be designated for the spirits from the other side when they visit. “Install” large wall speakers, spanning from the floor to the ceiling, facilitating clear communication with the other side. Once the speakers are in place, add a big screen TV to receive symbols and messages.

Alternatively, a keyboard or a pen and paper can also facilitate in recounting the messages received. Adjacent to the screen is a switch indicating “Off-On-Standby”.  Toggle the switch from off to on to power the speakers and the big screen TV. The author also suggested that you can add a table (or perhaps any furniture that you see fit) for conducting your own psychic healings. With these additions, your psychic room is complete.

Before leaving, switch the control to standby. The author explains that this grants you the ability to toggle your psychic abilities On-Off or on Standby. It’s advisable to keep it on standby when not in use, as turning off your psychic senses means no connection. Upon returning, simply switch it from standby to on to regain control of your psychic senses.

With the switch in the Standby position, the door to the room opens, allowing you to exit. Walk back to the elevator, which awaits your return. As you pass through the door, it gently closes behind you. Inside the elevator, the glass doors close, and you observe the colors below shifting like a sea – from purple to blue, then green, yellow, orange, and finally red. Descend through this spectrum to the ground floor, where your journey began, feeling simultaneously relaxed and energized.

The author said that on the Other Side, there is no anger, hate, or hostility. To connect, you must also leave behind any such feelings. While the Other Side acknowledges these emotions, they exist at a higher level of consciousness and in unity.

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