The inner “bad” voice has a name

When I was in kindergarten, my religion teacher, Miss Miranda, would teach us the concept of good vs bad and angel vs devil. The “devil”, she said, sits on the left shoulder, and the angel is on the right shoulder. So if you want to hear the “good voice” clearly, look to your right more often. So you see, this early, we were being taught about “labeling” and that the “left” carries a negative connotation! See how our education system sucks! (chuckles).

These voices are sometimes called inner critics; or the ally/parasite voices, according to the book Mastery of Self by don Miguel Ruiz. When I started realizing I have these two opposing “voices” in me, I began to observe the traits of these two voices. The “bad voice”, it seems to me, is more persistent, louder, and more direct than the “good voice”. And because of that, it most of the time wins the debate until I realize too late that I should have listened to the “good voice”.

It has been a constant battle for me to listen to the “good voice” more often; and dismiss the pessimist, defeatist, and malicious charm of the “bad voice”. This “bad voice” thrives on one’s insecurities, fears, obsessions, and vices. That is why, these are the areas that the “bad voice” pounces on when you are making decisions, needing clarity, or trying to be a better person. It knows the old habits that are keeping you from achieving your goals. It can charm you out of your resolve to change for the better. In other words, the more you give in to those negative traits, the louder the “bad voice” becomes that it can mute the “good voice” until the latter becomes inaudible.

Meanwhile, the “good voice” is the voice of our higher self. It comes from truth, wisdom, and compassion. It is an authentic voice that is not bound by any religious beliefs, cultural limitations, and societal pressure. The voice of the higher self is pure as it is rooted in the Divine source.

Name it
To be able for me to tame the “bad voice” whenever it starts to take over the “good voice”, I gave it a name. I called it Kurdapya.

In the Philippines, the name “Kurdapya” is used for name-calling, one that is meant to tease, or sound comical but actually in derision for someone who is deemed stupid. I heard this name from my elders when I was a child. The name came about possibly from the eponymous 1954 film by Pablo S. Gomez and starred by Ms. Gloria Romero as Kurdapya, an “ugly duckling” with awkward manners.

So, whenever this mischievous voice comes a-buzzing, I call it out or reprimand it, saying, “Kurdapya, stop it!” or “Kurdapya, I am not going to listen to you!”. You have the upper hand to temper the bad voice. It should know that you are the master of your own thoughts and emotions. What you will not allow will not persist.

Pump up the volume
Your higher self’s voice can come off as soft, almost inaudible – and worse, could “atrophy” if you are not listening to it often. That is why sharpen your listening skills to your higher self’s voice by tuning in to it intently. Meditation can help in focusing. Also, ask the Angels for guidance to increase the volume of the “good voice” as well as raise your frequency to match that of your higher self’s voice. Another way is when the bad voice starts its chatter, intentionally call in your higher self’s voice to “volume up” so that you can “hear” it clearly.

Believe in yourself
Second-guessing yourself is the “bad voice’s” cue to start chattering. When making a decision, I ask for spiritual/Angelic guidance to provide me the clarity that I need so that I do not need to second-guess. But even then, I still fall into the pit of second-guessing, and it is primarily because the information is not sufficient to make a purposeful decision. So, when making decisions, get the necessary information, ask questions, communicate, and research.

Turn the situation around
Whenever I tame the “bad voice”, I also tell it to cooperate. Because this bad voice is also our own voice coming from an “unhealed” part of ourselves. Whenever it speaks, it reminds you of your weaknesses and lessons that you are yet to learn. So train your “bad voice” to become a ” good voice”. As always, practice makes perfect!

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